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Toy Tuesday The Best South Park Toys

first_imgStay on target It’s sort of overwhelming to think that, if South Park was a person, it would be old enough to go get a beer with. Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s cut-out animation was a massive sea change for comedy, using primitive tools and wild satire to push every comfort envelope that Americans lived within. Sure, the show has oscillated in quality pretty heavily from season to season, but the sheer endurance it displays is pretty ridiculous.Over the years, there have been plenty of South Park toys, and here are some of our favorites.Classroom Construction SetMcFarlane Toys’ construction sets don’t have the infinite flexibility of Legos, but they’re fun in and of themselves. They deliver a ton of little details in a small scale. This set boasts 260 pieces that assemble to form a replica of Mr. Garrison’s classroom complete with two rows of desks, figures of Kyle and Cartman as well as their puppet-toting teacher and a bunch of accessories. And they’re compatible with the wider range of construction sets, so you can throw the animatronics from Five Nights At Freddys or zombies from The Walking Dead in there for laughs.Get it at AmazonProfessor Chaos Vinyl FigureStanding 7 inches tall, this vinyl figure of Butters’ evil alter ego is ready to wreak havoc across your toy shelf. Professor Chaos made his debut after Kenny’s “permanent” death, when the other three boys briefly enlisted Butters as a replacement before kicking him to the curb for being too lame. Driven mad by the experience, he donned a tinfoil helmet and started committing petty crimes like stealing erasers. Eventually he upgrades to larger-scale environmental crimes but those don’t work out as well either. This charming sculpt from Kidrobot stands seven inches tall.Get it at AmazonMezco Terrance & Phillip FiguresOne of the most entertainingly bizarre running jokes in South Park history is the depiction of Canadians as even more primitive cutout animation figures than the rest of the cast. It originally started with TV characters Terrance and Phillip before expanding to the entire country, and if you love the two farting morons Mezco has created some terrifyingly three-dimensional takes on the duo. They come with stands, plug-in “fart blasts” that you can attach to their buttocks and spring-loaded heads. There’s something amazingly absurd in the attempt to translate something this simple to high-end action figure form.Get it at AmazonAwesom-O FigureCartman has pulled lots of dumb stunts, but one of the most absurd came in the eighth season episode where he thought pretending to be a robot could gain him access to Butters’ innermost secrets. As Awesom-O, the rotund child discovers that Butters also owns a videotape of Cartman doing a Britney Spears dance routine and must keep the disguise going to get it back, even as Hollywood producers tap his infinite memory banks of bad movie ideas. This high-quality figure from Mezco measures 6 inches tall and comes with alternate arms and a removable helmet revealing Cartman’s sweaty face underneath.Get it at AmazonChef Action FigureWhen Isaac Hayes left the show in 2006 after South Park poked fun at Scientology, a lot of people wondered if the show would survive the loss of one of its most beloved supporting characters. Obviously that wasn’t as big a deal in hindsight, but it was fascinating that a guy who was willing to appear in all sorts of filthy stories couldn’t roll with a gentle needling at his alien space religion. You can relive the glory days with this excellent action figure from Mezco, featuring a tray of chocolate salty balls for snacking.Get it at AmazonKyle PlushWe’re trying to represent all four lead characters in this list in one incarnation or other, so let’s give Kyle — probably the most emotionally stable of the South Park quartet — a plush version. Made by Kidrobot, this stuffed companion stands around 7 inches tall and is show-accurate, with earflaps for his hat and other nice details. Sure, maybe the show doesn’t have the snuggliest characters, but showing a little tenderness might be good for the kid.Get it at AmazonKenny Figure With RatsThe running gag of Kenny croaking in every episode was one of South Park‘s earliest hooks, as viewers tuned in to see how he was going to die week after week. Pretty quickly they added in an extra element to make things even more gruesome, most notably a horde of rats who would show up to gnaw the flesh off of his bones to really hammer the point home. This Mezco figure makes up for a lack of articulation (and what would you expect) with a quartet of rodents ready to chow down on their next meal.Get it at AmazonDeluxe Talking Mr. HankeySouth Park originally started as a Christmas-themed animation that Stone and Parker made with their own money, and the show has returned to the holiday season numerous times for inspiration. The ninth episode of the first season introduced a very unlikely mascot in Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo — a talking turd that only appears to Kyle, the Jewish kid. It’s such a bizarre and unpleasant concept that they continued to revisit — did you know he lives in the sewers the rest of the year? – and now you can have a soft stuffed version that delivers some of the animated feces’ most iconic lines.Get it at AmazonCartman Action FigureProbably the most iconic of all the South Park characters, Cartman is loved because he’s sheer id, motivated by his selfish desires without any regard for other humans holding him back. That’s why he ends up motivating some of the show’s most memorable episodes. This Mezco action figure captures his essence ably, throwing in a bonus anal probe from one of the first season’s famous stories as well as his food-mooching gray cat Mr. Kitty, always going after his Cheesy Poofs.Get it at AmazonFunko Pop StanThe big-eyed sculpt style of Funko Pops interacts very strangely with the minimal design of South Park — cutting out the large whites of the characters’ eyes leaves them looking like they’ve been possessed by otherworldly entities from beyond the dimensional barrier and are coming to strip your soul from your body. Which, knowing South Park, is very possible. Funko has Pops of pretty much the entire cast and a ton of supporting characters, but if you’re going to start somewhere you might as well start with Stan Marsh.Get it at AmazonPC Principal FigureOne of the most popular characters introduced in recent seasons of South Park, the PC Principal was introduced at the beginning of the 19th season and has served as a mouthpiece for the creators’ libertarian views on speech policing, for better or for worse. He definitely added a different moral angle to the plotlines from that season forward, and it’s doubtful he’ll go a way for a while so why not add him to your collection with this 3″ KidRobot vinyl figure? Maybe he can fistfight your GI Joes.Get it at AmazonMore on Geek.com:The Schwiftiest Rick & Morty ToysThe Best Stranger Things ToysThe Best My Hero Academia Toys The New Lego UCS Imperial Star Destroyer Is Nearly Four Feet LongToy Tuesday: The Best ‘Gears of War’ Toys last_img

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